Wedding Planning: Don't Wait on These Things!

There are some things that you just shouldn’t wait until the last minute to do, and I’ve put together a list of some noteworthy ones.  While it may seem like once you have all your vendors booked it will be smooth-sailing into the big day, there are a million loose ends to tie up that month before your wedding.  For example, there are dress fittings, dress steaming, shopping for clothes for other wedding functions, picking up wedding bands, having rings cleaned, putting together gift bags, counting RSVPs, picking up wedding programs, packing for the honeymoon, and the list goes on… You will absolutely be busy, so don’t put these off:  

Wedding Signage: Everyone wants it, but for some reason, it gets pushed to the last few weeks for a lot of brides.  These things take time, so plan out your wedding signage along with your floral décor and design.  Whether it’s you, or someone you’ve hired, it takes time to create that chalkboard welcome sign/menu sign/specialty cocktail sign, not to mention sourcing the chalkboard, piece of wood, mirror, glass, etc. And if you’re having something printed, you still need to source the perfect frames.  

Marriage license: In Orleans Parish, you need to apply for your marriage license no sooner than a month before your wedding date (it expires at 30 days), and no later than 72 hours before.  However, that doesn’t mean you should wait until 30 days before to determine if you have the required documents.  Among other things, an original or certified copy of your birth certificate is required for issuance of a license, so if you’ve lost the original, you need to plan time to order a certified copy from your state of birth.

Deciding on a first look: You can find tons of blog articles on the benefits of doing a first look vs. waiting until the ceremony to see each other (and I’m all about a first look).  But don’t wait until the last minute to make this decision, because it has a huge impact on the timeline of the day. If you’re doing a first look, you need to have your hair and makeup finished earlier, you need to allot time to take more pre-ceremony photographs, and depending on where you do the first look, it can make a big difference in the timing of your transportation transfers.

Writing Down Your Vows: I’ve been in a few weddings where the couple finishes their vows at the last minute, e-mails the document to themselves, and then panics when they realize they will be holding their cell phone up at the altar.  Start drafting your vows a few months in advance, and write them down on nice paper, or hire a calligrapher.  Because the vows are pretty much the whole point, right? 

Wedding Planning: Venue Selection

So you met the one, got the ring, and now want to start planning the wedding. If you’re like me, you ignore all those blog posts that tell you to “enjoy being engaged” for a while before thinking about a wedding (is it possible to not think about the wedding at this point?) and jump right in.  This posts discusses some things to consider initially.

Photograph by Lauren Carroll Photography, Il Mercato, New Orleans 

1.       Prioritize the season, guest list, and venue.

Before you can decide on the venue and date, you have to consider what’s most important to you. If your first priority is a courtyard wedding in New Orleans, then that automatically excludes the hot summer months.  If your guest list is at 400 and can’t be cut, then you have to pick a venue that can accommodate those numbers. Finally, if you have your heart set on a particular venue, you can tailor the guest list and other decisions to that venue.

2.       Determine a budget.

If you are working with a non-negotiable budget, don’t waste your time looking at venues that you can’t afford. Make sure you are calculating venue costs appropriate by carefully reading the contract, paying attention to food and beverage minimums, taxes, gratuities, staffing fees, and any other added fees. Also note what the venue provides such as tables, chairs, catering, glassware, flatware, and figure out if that will be an added rental cost.  A planner can help you determine what a reasonable venue budget is in relation to your overall budget.

3.       Think about the reception style.

Determining whether you want a sit down dinner or a cocktail style reception is essential before picking a venue.  Formal sit down dinners require more space, as you will need seating for 100% of the guests. If you want a popular Southern style cocktail or station reception, you only need seating for a percentage of your guests. A venue that can accommodate 200 guests cocktail style may only be able to accommodate 90-100 for a full seating.  Also, seated dinners are typically pricier than cocktail style, so consider how this choice factors into your budget.

4.       Narrow down venue options.

If you’ve decided you want a sit down dinner for 200 guests with outdoor and indoor space, a planner can save you a lot of time and headache. There may only be two or three venues that meet that criteria.  Likewise, if you want to do a wedding for 200 on a limited budget, your venue options will be narrowed as well.  A planner can provide this information for you, so you can avoid looking at venues that don’t meet the specifics. If you are flexible on the season, guest list, and seating style, your options for venues will increase, allowing you to pick the perfect space that you love.  

Wedding Planning: Where to Spend, Where to Save

In any given city, including New Orleans, you can expect to spend a minimum amount for certain vendor categories, while other categories are more flexible. I've compiled a list of my recommended splurges, and also the more flexible categories, where you can save.  

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Spend

1. Photography

Your wedding lasts a day. The photos last forever. Sounds cliché, but it’s true.  As memories fade, those photographs are what’s left of the day, and having an amazing photographer makes a huge difference.  No matter what your wedding actually looks like, it can appear in the photos either sub-par or completely amazing. 

2. Flowers & Design

Flowers are a huge part of wedding design, setting the tone for the entire wedding.  How many photos have you seen of mismatched blush bridesmaids’ dresses lately? It’s those bouquets that lend personality to each wedding party.  All those pictures on Pinterest? It’s the design, styling, (and of course photography) that makes them pin-worthy. 

3. Band

Moving away momentarily from the look of your wedding, the actual party is all about a great band. The pros will have your guests on the dance floor all night long. Luckily, in New Orleans, we aren’t lacking for great music! 

Save

1. Wedding Cakes

Wedding cakes can be costly, but there are ways to save. One option is to simplify the design, and go for a plain or naked cake that can be decorated with flowers, berries, or other natural elements by your florist or planner for a simple look that's totally in style right now. Fancy fondant designs and sugar flowers can add up quickly.

Another option is to reduce the size of the cake and either serve another dessert alongside, or have your caterer serve guests from a sheet cake in the back.  A huge plus to using a smaller cake is that you can use a smaller cake stand, such as a pedestal. Smaller cake stands are really elegant, and the cake table itself can be styled to have the presence and drama of a larger cake.  

2. Transportation

Limos or charter bus transportation can take a large chunk out of your budget. You could avoid chartering guests around by picking a venue where it's not necessary (a second line from the church to the reception, perhaps?) However, if you do need those services, you can benefit from putting the work in and getting quotes from multiple companies, or hiring a planner who knows the vendors and can find you the best deal.  Prices vary greatly for charter bus transportation companies, as well as limousine services, so don't settle on the first, second, or even third quote you get.  However, still do your homework and make sure the reviews look kosher.

3. Invitations & Signage

Invitations, save-the-dates, signage, programs, etc., being relatively small and easy to ship, can be sourced from around the country.  While there are some great local shops, you can also find numerous options online, which opens up the market for a wide range of price points.  

French Wedding Lessons: All About Joy

This past July, I traveled with my husband, Pierce, and his family, to attend the wedding of his cousin, Valerie, to Sébastien, in Grignan, France.  Grignan, about a two-hour drive from the airport in Lyon, is situated in the Rhône-Alpes region of Southeastern France. While I won't bore you with a narrative of my trip, I feel incredibly lucky to have visited this place, somewhere I never otherwise would have discovered.  Out of all the places I visited while we were in Europe, Grignan was my favorite. And Paris…so maybe I just love France!

Me, drinking rosé, because that's what you do in France.

I wanted to write this post to describe the experience I had, and to try to put into words the differences between this wedding and the weddings I see here in New Orleans (including my own).  In part, I wish I'd written this months ago when the events were still fresh, but the memory I have is more of a feeling, which I think is probably more authentic than all the little details.  

Thanks so much to Chloe Sinanoglu for allowing me to use all of her gorgeous photographs! After putting this blog post together, I realized her pictures alone tell the story of this wedding, and illustrate my thoughts perfectly.  Chloe is a destination photographer and available for travel. You can view her website here. 

The wedding took place on a hilltop, in an old monastery, overlooking fields of lavender.  Stunning is an understatement, but what struck me about the day, beyond the amazing location, was how simplistically beautiful everything was, how relaxed everyone seemed, and how joyful. Kids ran around, guests mingled for hours, champagne was flowing, and generally, the pace was much slower and laid back than what you experience in the South. This wasn't about a giant cake, fancy food, or cascading flower arrangements (although the food was amazing, and the décor beautiful). It was truly about two people, enjoying every moment of the weekend, literally laughing, running, and dancing the whole time.

Bride before the ceremony.  

Although I couldn't understand one word, the ceremony was beautiful! 

The couple with their beautiful baby. 

Admittedly, some of these attributes would be difficult to recreate for a New Orleans wedding—most venues rent out spaces for a short amount of time; you probably aren't renting out a space for a whole weekend.  But what is notable, at least from my perspective, was how relaxed everyone was, including the bride and groom. Maybe it was French joie de vivre, maybe it was the couple themselves, but it was truly an experience to learn from.

My personal favorite detail--hats for the sun-drenched ceremony.

I had a difficult time wording this next thought as a wedding planner: don’t take the party too seriously.  As someone who plans weddings all day, coordinates the tiniest details, and lives for wedding décor, I don’t mean that all the lovely details aren't important! (And this wedding had them, for sure.) But when you’re the bride, all that planning should be finished ahead of time.  Looking through these photos, this is the experience I strive to give my clients.  On your wedding weekend, refocus yourself on your marriage, the people who are there with you, and truly celebrate—don’t waste your energy worrying about a million little details.  Relax, laugh, and live the moment, because it really goes by so fast.  

New Orleans Vendor Spotlight: D play

I get questions all the time about ceremony music-what instruments should I pick, how many do I need, what goes together? Although I’m a HUGE music fan, and know what I like, I can’t speak very intelligently on what instruments work together, and why.  So, I turned to the experts (and while I was at it, I also got the need-to-know on second lines).

This is the first blogpost in my new wedding planning series: New Orleans Vendor Spotlight.  Featured today is John Hozey of D Play, a full service wedding band in New Orleans. I’ve heard these guys rock a reception, but what you may not know is that they also offer ceremony music and second lines. You can view their website here. 

Ceremony Music Breakdown

To start off, I asked John his favorite ceremony combo.  His response: “An upright bass, piano, and acoustic guitar.”  However, he admits that music is subjective, so his choice is based strictly on what he likes to hear.  He often asks couples whether they want a more “traditional” (i.e. Canon in D, Ode to Joy, etc.), or “contemporary” sound.  Traditional songs work great with a string quartet or trio, typically including a violin, cello, or upright bass, viola, or a classical guitar.  Contemporary song choices lend themselves more towards piano and guitar, sounding great and easily playing songs that weren’t written hundreds of years ago.  An acoustic guitar and/or piano matches well with just about any instrument, including a violin and/or cello.

I also asked John if any one instrument works nicely alone.  “Acoustic guitar, harp, or piano go well by themselves.”  He explained that when looking for a solo instrument, you want an instrument that typically plays chords along with the melody, to make sure the sound is full. 

Lastly, I asked him if anything doesn’t work. “Any time you get great musicians, they can make it sound good. Even If you wanted a tribal ceremony and hire just a hand drum! We’ve done that before. Polynesian style!”

New Orleans Second Lines

I started with the basics, asking John what makes up the foundation of your traditional New Orleans second line.  “It’s so loose but really, you need a sousaphone (tuba), bass drum, snare drum, and trumpet. You can replace the trumpet really with a sax or trombone, but that is the most prevalent in New Orleans second lines.”  As far as add-ons? Go with another trumpet, trombone or sax. 

Is it possible to get a traditional sound with only a four-piece? John prefers more than a four piece- D Play offers a six-piece for their second line.  “The sound I hear from second lines from a melodic perspective is how the horns work together.  They tend to play both with and around each other. So unique.  This can’t happen with one lead horn.” 

Of course, if you want to go all out, add on your dancing man or Indian. “The possibilities are endless. It depends on how involved you want it. Some people want the real deal and a straight up party in the streets!”

Thanks to D Play for helping out with these questions! Stay tuned for more from my New Orleans Vendor Spotlight series!